The new school year

I have been not updating for a while because I was too busy feeling sorry for myself. I am not sure why but it was a long month for me. I felt completely out of control and hated that I could not shake the feeling. I ended up getting a lot done around the house because of it, my house is now junk free and free of old clothes and unnecessary items. Yay! Another good part is I lost 10 pounds. That is only because I could not eat, but I will take it. I am not sure what brought it on, but I am glad it is now gone. The Lord is blessing me in a lot of ways and I am exactly where he needs me to be right now, but I guess I was just being selfish. I saw him using me to bless others, but I wanted more for me. I was even to the point of taking my kids to my mom's house a couple times because I knew I was not a good mom that day or I wasn't going to be any help to them at all. I love them with all I am but for some reason I had had enough. I can't do anything with out them. I know I can get sitters but I have to have money to pay them, didn't have that. My mom helps but its only when I have to work or school seminars. Not just so I can have a day off. I really can't complain, she helps more than a lot of parents do, and does it willingly.
So with the new school year I am starting fresh! Madison started preschool, she loves it. I am trading babysitting with my neighbor so I can go to the gym without kids or paying the daycare, and am starting a weight training program that is promising big results in 20 weeks! Here we go! That was another problem, I have been at the gym for months and not much in results. I am so excited to see what comes. I start school in just under 2 weeks and this is the last home stretch for my degree!! I am going to stay positive and not let another month happen like it did.
Also I finally caught up with the rest of the world and read the Twilight books. That turned into a little addiction for a while. I read all 4 books in 5 days! Loved them! I even read the start of Midnight Sun on the authors website and liked it even more. I am so glad she did decide to finish it. I do not like the movie as well after reading the book, but am so looking forward to seeing new moon still. Malia and I already have our date set to go see it, just have to get a sitter.